top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

Merry Christmas all, and enjoy or be horrified by this weird collection of nativity oddness from Mark Oestreicher.  Mark Oestreicher is a 30-year veteran of youth ministry, and the former President of Youth Specialties. Marko has written or contributed to more than 50 books, including the much-talked-about Youth Ministry 3.0. Marko is a speaker, author, consultant, and leads the Youth Ministry Coaching Program.  Check out his blog.

the kitty cat nativity. makes me want to cough up a hairball.
catnativity1 300x168 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

the nativity kitchen timer:
nativitytimer 237x300 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

the cowboy nativity. yee-ha!
cowboynativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

yeah, the cat nativity is probably worse. but these dogs ain’t much better…
dognativity 300x201 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

technically, not a nativity. but it’s a christmas lawn ornament, showing (can you believe it?) the flogging of jesus on the way to the cross. there’s some christmas cheer for your neighborhood!
flog lights top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

also not technically a nativity; just a horribly cheesy christian kitschmas decoration: the jesus tree topper. dude, that robe is not working for you. and stop using that flat-iron on your hair.
jesustreetopper 209x300 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

back to actual nativity sets. this one is a craft kit, using marshmallows to make a nativity. yum.
marshmallownativitycraft top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

not to be outdone by the marshmallow nativity craft kit i posted last, this s’mores nativity just might be the single worst nativity i’ve come across…
smoresnativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

this isn’t a whole nativity set, but i think the other pieces are available. i didn’t have the strength to look. this mouse drummer boy is just about as confusing as a bit of kitchmas junk can get.
mousedrummernativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

when searching for tasteless nativity sets online, it doesn’t take long for one to stumble onto multiple versions of bears…
nativitybears top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

this rubber duckie nativity has to be right up there in the “worst” section of cheesy nativity sets…
nativityrubberduckies top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

lotsa santa nativity sets and pieces out there, but this one is a bit disorienting. is the holy family IN santa’s bag? or does santa have an nice applique of the holy family on his bag of gifts? and, what can the letters in santa be re-arranged to spell?
nativitysanta top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

if cats, dogs, and teddy bears weren’t enough, how ’bout penguins!?
penguinnativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

sure. snowmen. shouldn’t be a surprise.
snowmannativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

ah, the veggie nativity. i debated on this one, because i’ve always been a veggie fan. but the baby carrot pushed me over the edge into including it.
veggienativity1 300x300 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

this nativity — well, i just don’t even know how to describe it. clowns? modern art? the baby jesus seriously looks like something out of a circus or a john waters movie.
weirdnativity top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

oh, the animals. i suppose, while i think the dog nativity and cat nativity are somehow explainable as something people WAY too “into” those particular animals might display, this chicken nativity is just a bit beyond my comprehension as a purchasable — nay, displayable — holiday trinket.
chickennativity 300x235 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

you know those people who have those geese on their porch? yeah, them. and they put a cute little goosey costume on their porch-goose to mark every season? yeah, those people. this costume set is made for those people. or, to clarify, for those who actually have TWO of those geese already. sigh. i’m guessing the rubber ducky baby is “not supplied”.
goosenativity 300x266 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

what better expresses the spirit of the incarnation than owls? i found these at this cavalcade of nativities, where the comment was: whoooo is the son of god? whooooo?
owlnativity 300x193 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

yes, i give you, the naked troll doll nativity. eesh. feh.
trollnativity 300x300 top 37 worst nativity sets by Mark Oestreicher

the irish nativity, where the 3 irish wise guys have clover, gold and guinness:

he most viral nativity from last year’s holiday season… the meat nativity (yes, bacon and sausage):

and, why not the butter nativity:

the cupcake topper nativity. holy and yummy all at once!

 

the pig nativity. oink-vey: certainly not kosher…

the mary-and-josesph-as-kids nativity. this one is mildly disturbing, particularly in light of rampant infantalization of teenagers in our culture and the dropping age in puberty (though i’m sure that’s not what the creators of this had in mind).

 

in keeping with our current cultural fascination with all things zombie, i give you the etsy craftiness of: the zombie nativity. really, just, no comment.

the nativity carved out of spam! (thanks, adam!)

#29. the shotgun shell nativity. what a blast (get it!?). perfect for your redneck christmas, i suppose.

 

#30. the peg doll nativity. other than collecting some larger figures and one smaller one, and telling me it’s a nativity, this one doesn’t exactly scream “manger”.

#31. the mice nativity. say goodbye to the cookies you left out for santa.

#32. the fondant nativity. maybe even tastier than the s’mores nativity? can something be tasteless and tasty at the same time?
ah, sadness — the owner of this pic didn’t see the fun in this, and has demanded i remove the photo and link. merry christmas!

#33. um, the official description is “folk nativity“. but i’m pretty sure that’s a small 7 eleven frozen burrito with a face on it, along with two new age tree fairies, or something.

#34. the soggy jesus nativity. i’m sure there are plenty of nativities in a snow globe, were all three (or more) characters are IN the globe. but this freakish thing just has jesus in there, with mary and joe staring at their baby-in-a-fishbowl. too weird and hilarious.

something’s fishy about this one: #35, the mexican mermaid family nativity. i actually kind of dig this one, but maybe it’s just because the detail of the craft is so amazing. thanks to karen on flickr for allowing me to post this one.

#36, the godzilla nativity. horrible/funny/creative/sacrilegious.

and #37, what i can only call the ‘minimalist nativity’. props to some kindergarten art class for this one, or some very lazy community college art student.