Why is it that for some families, and maybe yours is one of them, you just see such harmony and love? You see Dad really getting spoiled on Father’s Day. You see respectful children who for weeks have been thinking about that special gift for Dad. You see the adoring wife who so appreciates the fatherly energy Dad brings to the family. Father’s Day is a real celebration for all.

Then there’s the rest of us. Families in tatters or perhaps just lackadaisical. The kids can’t be bothered to acknowledge Father’s Day, or, if they do so, it’s with as little effort as they can muster. (Oh for a clay ashtray manufactured by my little child’s hands of yesteryear!)

Musing on this got me to thinking about families and how special and tough they can be.  I wrote a piece about that, especially after attempting to reunite with my brother after essentially 20 years of estrangement.

Spoiler alert… or on second thought, don’t let me spoil it; it’s written down below. I can tell you this… if my Dad were alive today, it would have made him very happy. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Blessings to you and yours, and, to you dad’s out there, I sincerely want to wish you a Happy Father’s Day.

After Twenty Years

I am the baby of the family. I know it is shocking to find the baby of any family, choosing a profession as an adult that draws attention to himself, you know, like a comedian.

Anyhoo, I am the youngest of four children. I have a brother, Kirk, who is five years older than I, two sisters, Vicki and Lori, in between, and then there is me. As all youngest children think, your parents stopped breeding when they hit perfection!  Truth is, after I was born, Mom told Dad if he touched her again she’d shoot him. Or something like that.

Having four kids in five years will do that to a woman. Not being a woman, I can only guess, of course. But I know what having a stomach ache does to my mood and I can’t imagine how many people would have met their demise if I had a nine-month stomach ache, five years in a row.  Looking back, I am sure it was why my mom insisted on having the lights on all the time. In her mind, bad things happened when the lights were off.

Being the youngest, of course I was Mom’s favorite (don’t worry, my sisters don’t read my blogs and my brother is illiterate). I always thought I was Mom’s favorite because I was just darn special. My wife Tami, who is an oldest child, jealous of me, and a mother, told me, if I was Mom’s favorite it was because I was her last – and being the fourth in five years it probably took her less than two minutes of labor to deliver me.

The reason I bring all this up is that the older I get, the more I want to be around my family.  Truth is, I miss them. We have a lot of laughs when we get together. The problem is that it seems to be only at weddings or funerals that we can see each other. I am fortunate that in my job I travel quite a bit and I am able to sit with my sisters when I am in Dallas or Vegas.

My brother, Kirk, is another issue. We have been estranged for almost two decades. I have missed him the most. The few conversations we have had over the years on the phone have always left me hope that one day God would heal whatever was standing between us. Those of you who have seen me perform know that I have asked for prayer for him as well as me.  Well, I can tell you all Thank You for your prayers; this one has been answered. I sat with my brother over lunch last week in Indiana, when I was in town for a show.

We have both gotten older and balder but the bond between us is the same. We picked up right where we left off twenty years ago. He punched me in the face and I cried like a four year old schoolgirl.

Well, I cried, not because he punched me, but the mere sight of my brother was an answer to a daily prayer for over ten years. I am not naive. There have been plenty of opportunities over the years for me to reach out, but fear always won the day.  I will not go into any great detail about the get-together other than to say that family bonds are forever – good, bad or indifferent, the bond is huge. One thing I know is that it is never too late to correct and change a course of action.

I would love to hear from you guys on overdue sibling get-togethers. If you’ve got something to share, you can leave comments below

God’s Peace be with you in your journeys, and remember, as hard as it is, we as Christians are to forgive as we too have been forgiven.

Blessings,
Jeff

For additional information on booking Comedian Jeff Allen at your event call Tim Grable at 615-283-0039.